Recently we looked at this list of 15 things put together by John Rampton which may be holding you back from financial freedom. The list is :
- Living Above Your Means
- Lack Of Determination
- Neglecting your Health
- Purchasing a Home
- Relying on One Source Of Income
- Wasting Valuable Time
- Not Acting on Your Ideas
- Not Reading
- Fear and Negativity
- Not Setting Goals
- Avoiding Routine
- Not Collecting Assets
- Spending Time with Toxic People
- Failing to Follow to Allocate your finances (70/30 rule)
- Not Having A Mentor
We have all been there, bewildered, frozen in wonderment, daunted, worried, fully of anxious anticipation - and in need of support, guidance, comfort, direction - A MENTOR.
The danger of not having a mentor in various areas of our lives, is that we can easily go off track, either pumped with enthusiasm and nobody to gently guide us, or start to spiral into a pit of despair.
Lacking direction causes anxiety, anxiety leads to worry, worry leads to non-rational thoughts, these thoughts lead to actions which we may regret, and those actions lead to perhaps an unfortunate outcome.
With a mentor in place, we can be gently guided when needed, grounded, and inspired. Whilst it is tempting to find the wisest sage possible to act as a mentor, it is not always necessary. If you are on page 3, and your mentor is on page 4, then they know more than you. At the same time, as the experience or learning is fresh with them, they may well be more familiar with what you are experiencing (rather than trying to recall it from many years gone by).
By the same token, never discount the experienced mentor, there is much that can be learned, and they may well have tremendous skills to learn. Also, a spouse can be a great guide and mentor - doing a fantastic job at keeping us grounded and realistic, at the same time as inspiring us to be as best as we can those we love most.
Of course, there are different mentors for different purposes. In my professional work, I am fortunate to have the guidance and support of many very wise and insightful people. George Kinder - the father of the Life Planning movement, Louis Vollebregt - an absolutely incredible Master Trainer from Holland,Tina Weeks - our founder of Serenity, and Julian Danobetia - the most incredible executive coach who runs 'Down the Corridor'. Add to that my very good friend The Reluctant Salesman Terry Mullins, and my wife Rach, and the professional team is complete, full of very wise and experienced people.
As I said, it is not necessarily the oldest and wisest which make good mentors. After 30 years of playing the trumpet, a pal of mine has recently been introduced to a new method of playing, unlearning all the bad habits which were adopted to get by, or taught from another perspective. As he works through the method, he imparts his learning to me to learn and adapt (after almost 40 years of playing). He is a few pages ahead, and appreciates the challenges of changing well established behaviour, and can readily sympathise with the challenges we both face.
A couple of great mentoring examples are how we guide our children (the most important mentoring job of all), and also, for us at Serenity, how we work with our clients, working with them through both their developmental and financial journey. Both roles are a very fine balance, as is every mentoring role between the recipient discovering, and being guided
Some aspects when choosing your mentors:
What do you want from the mentoring relationship?
Who do you know who may be able to fulfill that?
Would they be able to do it and what skills do they have?
Would it be a healthy relationship?
How will yo know when it is working?
No matter where you are in life, there is always room (and a need) for a mentor. Add to that, being a mentor for someone, and the lessons you share give you so much more insight and knowledge - never stop learning